I’m constantly seeing my sin creep out in my marriage, and it seems like relationships are failing all around me. It’s an unfortunate truth about the world we live in; brokenness is in every corner of our lives, and especially in our relationships. Through my sin and selfishness though, I desperately want to love my husband well. And I know the first step of that is recognizing that I can’t do it on my own, but need the Lord’s help.
As I thought about what this post would look like, I quickly realized that my own words were HARDLY adequate. Who am I to write about loving someone well? I fail at it 9 times out of 10! Lucky for me, I’m blessed to have some incredibly wise and loving people in my life. So I took to Facebook to ask them for their best piece of marriage or relationship advice. My heart was filled just reading all of their responses and seeing them affirm and encourage one another!
These people were both men and women, all different ages, some single, some dating, and some married. Here’s some of what they had to share:
We always say that it’s not so much marriage that is hard, life is hard and we’re married. It helps us stay more as a team mindset: us against our hardships instead of me against him.
When arguing, never say the word never, and never say the word always.
Say your vows often (especially if you wrote them), and frequently ask how your marriage is going and have honest conversations about it.
Eat a lot of ice cream!
Besides Jesus Take the Wheel! …
Save your emotional energy for things that really matter; not on how someone squeezes the toothpaste, etc. Stay engaged in relationships and community; isolation, for couples or individuals, is toxic. And invest in/plan purposeful alone time together. It won’t naturally be there because you live together.
Constant forgiveness, even if the other person doesn’t think he/she needs it.
Healthy communication is key! It’s okay to take a minute to collect your thoughts, but never ever let something thicken under your skin… and knowing that it all takes work. None of us are perfect, but we can always strive to be better.
Realizing you’re always on the same team, even when you’re disagreeing with one another. Argue as friends. When he loses, you also lose.
Invest in a king-size bed!